Am I balding?

I get this question often, too often. Young men send me pictures like the one shown below as if I have magical insight to offer. They are frightful because of the familial balding present in their families and project what they see upon themselves. My answer to this man is to purchase a hand microscope from Amazon and determine where significant miniaturization is present that predicts the balding process.

[If you have any questions, you can reach me at williamrassman33@gmail.com]